Domestic violence and domestic abuse can be difficult to recognize, especially when it’s happening to someone close to you. Often, victims may hide their suffering due to fear, shame, or denial, making it even more challenging for friends and family to notice the warning signs. However, being aware of the subtle cues can make a significant difference in offering support and potentially saving a life.
Emotional and Behavioral Changes
One of the most telling signs of domestic abuse is a noticeable change in behavior or mood. If a usually outgoing and social friend suddenly becomes withdrawn, anxious, or depressed, it could be a red flag. They might cancel plans frequently or isolate themselves from their social circle, often at the insistence of their partner. Additionally, they may seem unusually nervous or fearful, particularly when their partner is mentioned or present.
Physical Signs
While not all forms of domestic violence result in visible injuries, physical signs can be a clear indicator. Unexplained bruises, cuts, or other injuries that are often brushed off with vague explanations should raise concern. A friend or family member might wear long sleeves or sunglasses indoors to hide these marks, even in inappropriate weather or settings.
Controlling Behavior from Their Partner
Abusive relationships are often marked by extreme control. If you notice that your friend or family member’s partner is overly controlling—dictating where they go, who they see, or even how they dress—it’s a serious warning sign. This control might extend to finances as well, with the abuser limiting access to money, leaving the victim financially dependent and unable to leave the relationship.
Reluctance to Speak Openly
When domestic violence is present, victims may avoid talking about their relationship, become defensive, or shut down completely when the topic arises. They may make excuses for their partner’s behavior, even when it’s clearly harmful. A friend who once confided in you might become secretive or refuse to discuss their personal life.
Excessive Communication
If a partner is constantly calling or texting, demanding to know where your friend or family member is at all times, it’s another red flag. This type of excessive communication is often a tactic used by abusers to monitor and control their partner’s every move.
What You Can Do
If you suspect someone you care about is experiencing domestic violence, it’s important to approach the situation with empathy and caution. Start by expressing your concern in a non-judgmental way, offering a listening ear. Let them know you’re there for them, no matter what. It’s crucial not to pressure them into leaving the relationship before they’re ready, as this could increase their danger. Instead, encourage them to seek professional help, whether through a counselor, a domestic violence hotline, or a local shelter.
Family Crisis Council of Rowan, Inc. is always here to help. We can be reached 24 hours a day, 7 days a week, 365 days a year at 704-636-4718.
Domestic violence thrives in silence. By recognizing the signs and offering support, you can help break the cycle of abuse and provide a path to safety for those in need.
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